I am just back from a lovely weekend with my cousin in Prague…well, she actually isn’t a blood relative, but she and I agree that we are FAMILY. It started me thinking…sometimes family is a natural selection process, isn’t it? Those to whom we are drawn and with whom we have the most magical moments and synchronicities are like family-so shouldn’t they also be called family?
Perhaps it is time to rethink our definition of family. Part of having an authentic life is being present and actively participating in relationships. When we do this, the bonds are deep and lasting…and ultimately more meaningful to everyone involved.
This week, I challenge you to notice those to whom you are drawn; those people who cross your path as a synchronicity. Be alive and awake in your interactions. Genuinely care about them. Make an effort to add to their lives and it will add to yours ten-fold. That’s the kind of relationships I want in my life; what about you? Hey, you can never have enough family, right?
Do you have similar “family”? How do you nurture the relationship? Can’t wait to hear! Please share your thoughts below or email me at ellen@yourtransformationcoach.com.
Ellen Thomas, founder of Your Transformation Coach, is passionately dedicated to helping people live their authentic life NOW. Her philosophy: Why wait? Every moment of your life has significance. Don’t waste another second not experiencing the true meaning in your life! A military spouse with an MBA in International Marketing, she is multi-lingual, an avid runner and loves to travel. She currently lives near Stuttgart, Germany with her husband Michael and canine running coach Bella. Catch a sneak peak of her upcoming webinar Ten Keys for Living Outside of the Box here.
Throughout my life I’ve had family that wasn’t acquired through DNA. These people have profoundly impacted my life and, in many instances, I have been closer to them than my blood relatives. Earlier this month I re-connected with my “little brother” with whom I lost contact 30 years ago. It was a joyful reunion and we plan to never let that happen again.
Love hearing stories like this! Thanks for sharing!
I first began to understand made and found family, versus blood family, when I was in college. Living together like that, we formed really tight bonds. And I’ve been collecting folks ever since. It’s such fun to think about families as something created rather than fallen into. When I think about this, I look around me and see so much love!
To me, the single most important thing to do to nurture relationships is attention. Make time for people. Look them in the eye when I talk to them. No multi-tasking. Listen to what’s going on under the words and respond to that.
More of my adventures at http://www.gayedelman.com
Gay, so true! When we multitask, we aren’t our authentic selves (perhaps crossing stuff of the list, but not really connecting!). And, when we are truly authentic, the real bonding starts and the relationship is nurtured. Thanks for taking the time to stop by and share!
I love this post, it make our life easy to think that we might be away from our blood relative, but we can always find new family anywhere we go. I feel that when we have a connection with someone that comes so easily and effortless that means that you have a person by your side that can became part of your family for a lifetime.
Yes! Family doesn’t have to be limited… It is truly a gift when you find someone with whom you can so easily connect and communicate. Thanks, Carla, for your comments!
Carla, so true! We can’t always go “home” for the traditional family holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas, but we can build loving, authentic relationships with people with whom we can celebrate, right?
I definitely had to re-think the definition of family when I moved away from my family years ago. I have made great relationships with people that I consider more than friends. They truly are like family because they have been a huge support system for me and helped me create community. Great post!
Thanks for sharing, Tamara! I’m so glad you were open to the possibilities of expanding the definition of family. Now you have a terrific support system-woohoo! It is up to US to make things happen. Being proactive is key-as you have so aptly illustrated!
Great post and very timely for me. Getting ready to move this summer and will be looking forward to making new friends.
Kim, as a military spouse, I move frequently, and it has been such a gift since it has motivated me to get “out there” and make it happen rather than sitting back and waiting for that knock on the door… Wishing you a terrific summer filled with the beginnings of deep and lasting friendships.
I’m glad you enjoyed your trip Ellen. I have extended family all over the place. I have a great group of girlfriends who are as dear to me as blood sisters. I define family as those in your circle who offer genuine, unconditional love. Those you can be yourself around ALL the time. Sometimes we try to hold on to ‘family’ relationships that aren’t as nurturing or healthy as others.
- Dorethia
http://www.themoneychat.com
http://www.connercoaching.com
Dorethia, you really hit the nail on the head! Those with whom we can be ourselves without worrying that we have lost the relationship-that IS family! So happy that you have those kind of relationships! I celebrate with you this joy!
Some of my favorite family members are family by choice. A while ago, I flew to San Francisco to witness the comedy debut of my newest niece – she adopted me. It was a wonderful reunion for me. My brother and sister, sister-in-law and niece were all there as well as my family-by-choice and we all had a wonderful time.
Thanks for sharing, DrSusan! How wonderful to celebrate such happy occasions surrounded by those with whom you have deep and lasting relationships.
My favorite “family” members are not blood related. I am closer to my mother-in-law and sister-in- law than my biological family.
Claire, that is the case for so many of us. What matters most is that we have a strong support system-and that we reach out and find it proactively. Kudos to you!
Some of my children’s favorite “aunts” and “uncles” are not blood relatives. The love and affection, not to mention the relaxed feeling that these special people have in our lives earn them the titles of “aunts and uncles.” I loved it when my youngest daughter asked how “Aunt Sandy” and I are related. Aunt Sandy is Korean and we are Scottish/Russian/Spanish. I just explained that she earned her honorary title by being the next best thing to blood relative.
Great Post.
Elizabeth, I love using the titles “aunt” and “uncle”! I use them liberally too and consider them a title of honor to bestow as well as to wear.
Two of my dear friends who got married a few years ago, opened their honeymoon itinerary to all of us as they traveled around SouthEast Asia. I joined them on their India part of the leg – and I never felt like a 3rd wheel since we loved each other like family, and had an amazing time!
Sara, that is so amazing! What a wonderful experience; thanks for sharing!